Strap-Ons

[phetish]

As difficult as it may be to coerce the stereotypical female vanilla sprite into anal sex, it is somehow more difficult to talk the average man into anal play.

This makes no sense to me; our digits are smaller, we are generally more gentle creatures, men actually have a prostate...I mean, who wouldn't want g-spot stimulation?

Then I stumble over the community, and I understand. Posted in increasing levels of WTF...



"Pony! My pony! Giddy-up! Who loves a carrot?"



Instead of spraying her with muppet semen, someone should have shot this girl with a tranquilizer. She is the 100-pound reincarnation of a large prison rapist.



Dancing with your dick in someone is punishable by instant surrender of the slut membership card. Also, no one has seen those moves since Pump Up The Jam.



What a careless bitch. People have died from that. She's so anxious to get in a feminine fist-pumping that she nearly takes her partner's ass with her before realizing she's still attached. There's an experience every lover covets; being fishhooked with a plastic horse dick.

You're just making my job harder, ladies.

Comments

[zombiegoat.livejournal.com]

My soul is now officially fucked up.

[flameamongcoals.livejournal.com]

By what part, exactly? :D

[zombiegoat.livejournal.com]

The last one.

[flameamongcoals.livejournal.com]

It's really amazing, what women get away with.

[tehuti.livejournal.com]

Clearly have been asking the wrong men, and you need to ask the right ones. There's quite a few of us that don't need to be talked into it.

I do agree with you on the last one, though. That would be a HELL NO for me.

[flameamongcoals.livejournal.com]

It can only be the stigma. But I'll never know why people are ashamed of sexual adventure.

[jourdannex.livejournal.com]

I agree with first poster about that last one. Oh man. You cannot unsee what you have seen. WHY WHY WHY

[flameamongcoals.livejournal.com]

You know, I just now noticed that copious white fluid flows out of his butt when she pulls out. I think that's Crisco on his cheeks, but I don't know what the apparent fake ejaculate could be.
It just gets worse, the longer you look at it. :)

[grunald.livejournal.com]

I love you. ;)

And I've been around too much of the internet to even be phased by the third one.

Nice to see some posts from you on the good old el-jay!

[flameamongcoals.livejournal.com]

I missed this. I thought it was auto-posting from other sites, but apparently not. I've never found a community that compares to this one.

[not-only-no.livejournal.com]

Truth be told, I'd take a strap-on. Have to work up to it, tho.

I'll pass on the harness..
That last one was just wrong, tho. lol

[flameamongcoals.livejournal.com]

I'd recommend plugs over dildos of increasing size. That said, it shouldn't be that difficult or uncomfortable. Well, unless it's a carnival penis, as above.

[anathemadevice.livejournal.com]

yeah. that last one. really internetz? reeeeeally?

[flameamongcoals.livejournal.com]

YEAH!
*FIST PUMP*
YEAH!

Something about her reminds me of a River City Ransom character.

[dietrich.livejournal.com]

Ay, yi yi yi.

You've read Bitchy Jones, right? Sadly much of her archive is gone, but there's still good stuff there.

She's totally against strap-on play for herself, for very interesting reasons, and I can see where she's getting them from: in what way are any of these about anyone's pleasure?

The imagery around this shit is ridiculous; can we get some men who are experiencing pleasure from this rather than humiliation combined with pain? Can we get some women who are using their strap-ons as if they owned cocks?

More ranting on this topic here.

[flameamongcoals.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you linked your post, because it saves me some time explaining why I do like them. Also, the Feeldoe is designed to pleasure both partners. Sadly, they don't appear in porn very often for the same reason that real sex doesn't appear in porn very often - it isn't really photogenic.

[humanoid27.livejournal.com]

ok, that lastone just doesn't seem possible...

... but what really has me worried is that these... 'examples' has me a little aroused... what's going on?
:)

[flameamongcoals.livejournal.com]

I agree. That guy must have some anbesol on his asshole or something. :)

It's natural - I would think anal sex would appeal to men more than it would, to women. If the male g-spot were located anywhere else, guys would be rubbing it all day long. :)

[pyxiez369.livejournal.com]

FYI: The male "G-Spot" is commonly referred to as the "P-Spot"